Philosophy of Ambiguity

FOR THOSE WHO LOVE THE PHILOSOPHY OF AMBIGUITY….( as well as the

idiosyncrasies of English)

1. ONE TEQUILA, TWO TEQUILA, THREE TEQUILA, FLOOR ……

2. ATHEISM IS A NON-PROPHET ORGANIZATION.

3. IF MAN EVOLVED FROM MONKEYS AND APES, WHY DO WE STILL HAVE MONKEYS AND APES?

4. THE MAIN REASON THAT SANTA IS SO JOLLY IS BECAUSE HE KNOWS WHERE ALL THE BAD GIRLS  LIVE.

5. I WENT TO A BOOKSTORE AND ASKED THE SALESWOMAN, “WHERE’S THE

SELF-HELP SECTION?” SHE SAID IF SHE TOLD ME, IT WOULD DEFEAT THE PURPOSE.

6. WHAT IF THERE WERE NO HYPOTHETICAL QUESTIONS?

7. IF A DEAF PERSON SIGNS SWEAR WORDS, DOES HIS MOTHER WASH HIS HANDS WITH SOAP?

8. IF SOMEONE WITH MULTIPLE PERSONALITIES THREATENS TO KILL HIMSELF, IS IT CONSIDERED A HOSTAGE SITUATION?

9. IS THERE ANOTHER WORD FOR SYNONYM?

10. WHERE DO FOREST RANGERS GO TO “GET AWAY FROM IT ALL?”

11. WHAT DO YOU DO WHEN YOU SEE AN ENDANGERED ANIMAL EATING AN ENDANGERED PLANT?

12. IF A PARSLEY FARMER IS SUED, CAN THEY GARNISH HIS WAGES?

13. WOULD A FLY WITHOUT WINGS BE CALLED A WALK?

14. WHY DO THEY LOCK GAS STATION BATHROOMS? ARE THEY AFRAID SOMEONE WILL CLEAN THEM?

15. If A TURTLE DOESN’T HAVE A SHELL, IS HE HOMELESS OR NAKED?

16. CAN VEGETARIANS EAT ANIMAL CRACKERS?

17. IF THE POLICE ARREST A MIME, DO THEY TELL HIM HE HAS THE RIGHT TO REMAIN SILENT?

18. WHAT WAS THE BEST THING BEFORE SLICED BREAD?

19. ONE NICE THING ABOUT EGOTISTS: THEY DON’T TALK ABOUT OTHER PEOPLE.

20. HOW IS IT POSSIBLE TO HAVE A CIVIL WAR?

21. IF ONE SYNCHRONIZED SWIMMER DROWNS, DO THE REST DROWN TOO?

22. IF YOU ATE BOTH PASTA AND ANTIPASTO, WOULD YOU STILL BE HUNGRY?

23. IF YOU TRY TO FAIL, AND SUCCEED, WHICH HAVE YOU DONE?

24. WHOSE CRUEL IDEA WAS IT FOR THE WORD “LISP” TO HAVE “S” IN IT?

25. WHY ARE HEMORRHOIDS CALLED “HEMORRHOIDS” INSTEAD OF “ASSTEROIDS”?

26. WHY IS IT CALLED TOURIST SEASON IF WE CAN’T SHOOT AT THEM?

27. WHY IS THERE AN EXPIRATION DATE ON SOUR CREAM?

maryt

Protestant militant tries to kill Irish leaders

From the latimes.com:

Attack on N. Ireland Assembly foiled

A Protestant militant with explosives is halted at the entrance after delegates failed to make a power-sharing deal.

By William Graham, Special to The Times
November 25, 2006
BELFAST, NORTHERN IRELAND — A Protestant militant armed with a gun and explosives tried to enter the Northern Ireland Assembly building Friday shortly after delegates inside missed another deadline on forming a provincial government.

From CNN.com

Adams murder bid: NI man charged
POSTED: 6:17 a.m. EST, November 25, 2006

BELFAST, Northern Ireland — Convicted loyalist killer Michael Stone has been charged with attempting to murder five people including Sinn Fein leaders Gerry Adams and Martin McGuinness at the Northern Ireland Assembly on Friday.

Stone, who was tackled by security officers at the entrance to Stormont Parliamentary Building, was also charged at Belfast Magistrates Court on Saturday with possession of weapons for terrorist purposes, including nail bombs and an ax.

For a history of The Troubles see the Wikipedia article.

maryt

 

 

Flying Spaghetti Monster

The Flying Spaghetti Monster. Ever hear of it? Have a look by clicking here.

See a brief video at Google video. 

You can play a game at venganza.org

There’s even a book you can get… The Gospel of the Flying Spaghetti Monster by Bobby Henderson.

And here you can read ”An Open Letter to the Kansas Board of Education” which explains everything. 

In the end it’s a very intelligent argument against intelligent design. Enjoy! maryt   

The Christian Right

An article in Slate magazine has come up with an interesting idea about what’s happening to the Christian Right.

In today’s Books section the article asks “What’s Up With the Christian Right?” By Hanna Rosin, dated Nov. 3, 2007. Ms. Rosin’s answer is

But the more likely explanation is the one offered by a host of recently published books: This time around, the Christian right we’ve grown used to has become just another part of the political establishment, with all the attending tedium.

Now that’s just another way of saying the pendulum is swinging the other way, isn’t it? And that’s good. It’s something I’ve been waiting for for a long time – since January 2001, hmm?

I hope something is happening to them. I hope their influence is “down the tubes,” as it’s said. Because that means we’ll have a strategy for getting out of Iraq, Roe v. Wade left unmolested, prayer in the church, synagogue or mosque, but not in the schools.

I guess we’ll see come Nov. 7, won’t we? maryt

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Muslim leaders write to Pope

Reuters
Muslim leaders write to Pope
Report
Watch the Video 01:15

Senior Muslim scholars have written an open letter to the Pope listing factual errors in his controverisal speech on Islam.

Sonia Legg reports.

Reuters
Muslims find errors in Pope’s presentation of Islam

Sat Oct 14, 2006 10:23am ET

By Tom Heneghan, Religion Editor

PARIS (Reuters) – Senior Muslim scholars, taking up Pope Benedict’s call for a frank dialogue, have written him an open letter listing factual errors in his recent speech on Islam that sparked protest across the Muslim world.

The 38 experts, including grand muftis from the Muslim world and scholars based in Britain and the United States, said they accepted the Pope’s stated regrets over the uproar and his expressions of respect for all Muslims.

The politely worded letter challenged the former theology professor on his own area of expertise and gave him poor marks for misreading the Koran, failing to use terms correctly and citing obscure and possibly biased sources. Read full article.© Reuters 2006. All rights reserved.For further information about the Pope and his unfortunate remarks about Islam see my blog The Work of the Poet

Inflammatory rhetoric

You know we’d all be better off if we refrained from inflammatory rhetoric in public. When a government official, a pope, a radical Muslim says outrageous things, UNDIPLOMATIC things, a situation, a state of affairs, is never made better.

People in high positions have to be very careful to review what they are going to say in a public speech so that there is ABSOLUTELY no possibility of insulting or humiliating anyone.

Yes, you can’t say ANYTHING nowadays. Yes POLITICAL CORRECTNESS amounts to DIPLOMACY.

One definition of DIPLOMACY is “skill in managing negotiations, handling people, etc., so that there is little or no ill will; tact.” Another definition is “the art and practice of conducting international relations.” (Reference.com) When heads of state speak publicly they are ALWAYS “conducting international relations” and should ALWAYS be aware of their words.

Pope Benedict XVI started this last unfortunate uproar. (See my previous posts) Did he review the words he spoke aloud? It’s not enough for him to say “I’m sorry Muslims took offense at my words. I was quoting from a 14th century dialogue between Byzantine Emperor Manuel II Paleologos and a Persian scholar.

In a passage on the concept of holy war, Benedict recited a passage of what he called “startling brusqueness.”

“Show me just what Muhammad brought that was new, and there you will find things only evil and inhuman, such as his command to spread by the sword the faith he preached,” Benedict quoted the emperor as saying. (Chicago Tribune)

Why was this passage chosen? It’s been said that the pope neither renounced nor endorsed the emperor’s words but used them as a preface to a discussion of faith and reason. (Chicago Tribune)

Does the pope mean to suggest that of all the religious writings at his disposal, this passage was the only one to say what he wanted to say on faith and reason? Oh come’on.

Muslim officials have been quick to remark:

Pakistan’s parliament adopted a resolution Friday condemning the pope and seeking an apology. The Foreign Ministry summoned the Vatican’s ambassador to express regret over Benedict’s remarks.

In Turkey, where Benedict planned to visit in November in his first trip as pope to a Muslim country, the deputy leader of Turkish Prime Minister Recep Tayyip Erdogan’s Islamic-inspired party called Benedict’s remarks the result of ignorance or a provocation.

“He is a poor thing that has not benefited from the spirit of reform in the Christian world,” Salih Kapusuz said. “It looks like an effort to revive the mentality of the Crusades.”

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And it is true that a radical Muslim element has indeed been spewing inflammatory rhetoric and threatening violence. And there is no excuse for the words or the violence.

“We urge you, Muslims, wherever you are to hunt down the pope for his barbaric statements,” Sheik Abubukar Hassan Malin has exhorted worshippers during evening prayers at a Mogadishu mosque. “Whoever offends our prophet Mohammed should be killed on the spot by the nearest Muslim.” (Boston Globe.com)

None of this helps anything. We should be working to bring peoples together not saying things that drive them further apart. And who are we? The United States, The United Nations, The European Union, Africa, Asia, the Middle East – anyone who has a stake in the world around us.

Such language polarizes us. It doesn’t bring the world together. And we’d better be thinking about coming together because further inflammatory rhetoric, further polarization, threatens our very existence. maryt

Pope Benedict XVI and Islam

How could Pope Benedict say so unthinkingly (at least I hope he was unthinking and not purposeful) the things he said yesterday about Islam and jihad? News reports said he quoted from an ancient and obscure Medieval text that said Islam was “evil and inhuman” and that Muhammad commanded Muslims to spread Islam by the sword. Muslims all over the world were outraged as indeed they should be.

What does anyone have to gain, least of all the Pope, by making such remarks in a public speech? Of course Muslims now ask for the Pope’s personal apology.

The Vatican said, “it was certainly not the intention of the Holy Father to undertake a comprehensive study of the jihad and of Muslim ideas on the subject, still less to offend the sensibilities of Muslim faithful.” (Muslims Demand Apology From Pope, Chicago Tribune) It may not have been the Pope’s intention to offend, but he did.

Did the Pope forget how Christianity was spread during the Middle Ages? Did he forget a little something called the Crusades? Not that anyone favors, or should favor, violence as a way to spread faith.

Please apologize Pope Benedict…maryt

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QUOTES FROM MUHAMMAD

“People will not sit remembering God without the angels surrounding them, mercy covering them, peace descending on them.”

“He is not strong and powerful who throweth people down; but he is strong who witholdeth himself from anger.”

911 5th Anniversary

What hasn’t been said about 911?  People blame God, they hate him, others pray to him for their loved one.

When my nephew went off to the Iraq War I asked “Why?” That he, my nephew,  would be killed in that war would be unconscionable.  Because he COULD be killed (he wasn’t and is home safe and sound), because the people were killed in 911, I believe, if there is a God, he wasn’t paying attention.  Or he’s, like the gods of Rome and Greece, playing and watching and not taking things here on earth seriously. 

So now where does that leave us for explanations? FATE. That terrible word meaning “something that unavoidably befalls a person; fortune; lot.” It’s a word that says there isn’t anyone guiding, controlling, watching, anything in this world.

Things happen.  Can we live with that?  I don’t know.

On that day my husband was in the World Trade Center. He didn’t die. He walked all the the way home to Queens. He was covered with dust. From the moment I heard about the planes I held my breath. I kept saying silently “Please, please, please, please…) At 1 o’clock in the afternoon my husband called me on my cell. “Mary I’m all right.” I couldn’t speak, I cried. Did God save my husband? And not save almost 3000 others?  I don’t know.

Things happen.

The rabbi chanting on the TV on Channel 13 takes the 911 calls of that day and puts them to a Torah chant. Simple and beautiful. But he says that’s all there is.  Is something out there?  I don’t know. It certainly gives solace to many to think there is. I didn’t need solace on that day. My loved one came home.

- my words for the 5th anniversary of 911.

Sixth Question

TESTING THE FAITH

Evangelist drowns trying to walk on water
Pastor reportedly told congregation he could repeat miracle of Jesus

——————————————————————————–
Posted: August 30, 2006
6:14 p.m. Eastern
© 2006 WorldNetDaily.com

An evangelist who tried replicating Jesus’ miracle of walking on water has reportedly drowned off the western coast of Africa.

Pastor Franck Kabele, 35, told his congregation he could repeat the biblical miracle, and he attempted it from a beach in Gabon’s capital of Libreville.

“He told churchgoers he’d had a revelation that if he had enough faith, he could walk on water like Jesus,” an eyewitness told the Glasgow Daily Record.

“He took his congregation to the beach saying he would walk across the Komo estuary, which takes 20 minutes by boat. He walked into the water, which soon passed over his head and he never came back.”

The New Testament records the story of Jesus walking on the Sea of Galilee as he approached his disciples in a boat.

“And in the fourth watch of the night Jesus went unto them, walking on the sea.” (Matthew 14:25)

As WND reported in April, a researcher at Florida State University believes he has a natural explanation for the account of Jesus’ miraculous walk on the surface of water – ice.

Professor of Oceanography Doron Nof and the co-authors of his study theorize that a rare combination of optimal water and atmospheric conditions resulted in a unique, localized freezing phenomenon called “springs ice,” according to Physorg.com, which specializes in news about science, technology, physics and space.

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I guess this is as good an explanation as any, no? maryt

The 1st Question

Salman Rushdie has the answer to the 1st question which I post this way: If you don’t believe in God, have a religion or faith, how can you have a moral sense, know right from wrong?

Rushdie said on Bill Moyers PBS series Faith and Reason last month and I won’t quote him word-for-word because I can’t:

Our moral sense, sense of right and wrong precedes religion. It’s not created by it. It’s what creates our need for religion.

Now that’s the best answer I’ve heard to those who insist that if you don’t believe or don’t have faith, you can’t have values. You can’t know right from wrong.

Inside all of us is a sense of right and wrong. We can know good and evil when we see it. We’re, what, born with it? Yes, maybe that seems right.